Here are the winning entries for Al's Jokebook challenge
First Prize goes to Deborah Capasso. She'll receive a $25 Bringhurst Gift Card for this joke:
An old Italian man was lying on his death bed when he suddenly smelled anise cookies. He thought to himself "could my loving wife be making my favorite cookies"?
He dragged himself out of bed, and slowly made his way down the stairs. When he got to the kitchen he saw hundreds of his favorite cookies spread out on the kitchen table. He fell to his knees and, with his last ounce of strength, reached out to the table to get a cookie.
Just then he heard a loud 'whack', and felt pain on the back of his hand as his wife swatted his hand with a spatula and said "Don't touch them. they are for the funeral'.
A $10 Bringhurst Gift Card goes to Steven Z., who won second prize with the following eyebrow-raiser:
A wife arrives home after a long shopping day and finds her husband in bed with a young lovely lady.
Just as she was about to walk out of the house, her husband said, "Before you leave, let me explain. Driving home I saw this young girl looking poor and tired and I offered her a ride. She was hungry so I gave her the Bringhurst roast you forgot about in the refrigerator."
"Her shoes were worn so I gave her a pair of your shoes that you don't wear anymore since they are out of style. She was cold so I gave her your birthday sweater you never wore since you didn't like the color. Her jeans were worn so I gave her a pair of yours that don't fit anymore."
"Then, just as she was about to leave the house, she paused and asked, 'Is there anything else your wife doesn't use anymore?'
And so here we are."
A wife arrives home after a long shopping day and finds her husband in bed with a young lovely lady.
Just as she was about to walk out of the house, her husband said, "Before you leave, let me explain. Driving home I saw this young girl looking poor and tired and I offered her a ride. She was hungry so I gave her the Bringhurst roast you forgot about in the refrigerator."
"Her shoes were worn so I gave her a pair of your shoes that you don't wear anymore since they are out of style. She was cold so I gave her your birthday sweater you never wore since you didn't like the color. Her jeans were worn so I gave her a pair of yours that don't fit anymore."
"Then, just as she was about to leave the house, she paused and asked, 'Is there anything else your wife doesn't use anymore?'
And so here we are."
Our 3rd place winner is Joy Robb, who also won a $10 Bringhurst Gift Card. She kept is short and sweet with this submission:
What did the fish say when he swam into a wall? Dam!
What did the fish say when he swam into a wall? Dam!
To our winners, and to everyone else who participated in this contest... thanks for making us smile!